FIVE WEEKS IN A BALLOON

The huge cast of Five Weeks in a Balloon

FIVE WEEKS IN A BALLOON (1962). Produced and directed by Irwin Allen. 

Balloonist Fergusson (Cedric Hardwicke) wants to explore Africa by air but also has a deeper concern: beating a group of slave traders to a certain uncharted territory so that it can be claimed for England instead of by them. The balloon eventually fills up with a riot of motley individuals: the fussy Sir Vining (Richard Haydn at his fussiest); Fergusson's handsome assistant Jacques (Fabian), who handles the engine; American ne'er-do-well reporter Donald O'Shay (a miscast Red Buttons); rescued slave, Makia (Barbara Luna); another rescued slave, Susan (Barbara Eden); and even the slave trader himself Ahmed (Peter Lorre). There are way too many people on this balloon!

Buttons, Luna, Fabian

Five Weeks in a Balloon is the second film version of Jules Verne's first novel of the same name. Flight of the Lost Balloon, made the previous year, is a cheaper copy with very different plot points. Released by 20th Century-Fox in CinemaScope, Five Weeks has much better production values. Unfortunately this adaptation is just as loose and silly. After The Brothers Four warble the title tune over the credits, Fabian reprises it twice -- I can't get the damn thing out of my head. It is slightly better than the title tune for Flight of the Lost Balloon. Instead of a drunken fat cannibal queen as in Flight, this version offers an equally fat and drunken sultan. There's a sandstorm that doesn't really amount to much, a few wild animals, minor romances, and a fairly exciting climax in the forbidden city of Timbuktu. 

Chester aka Duchess: a "simian sot!"

Fabian [Bus Stop] actually manages to give a decent performance, although there is absolutely nothing of the 19th century about him, especially his hair style. I had trouble understanding a lot of Hardwick's mushy speech. Hadyn seems to essentially be playing the same part he played in The Lost World and many other films. Eden and Luna are reasonably competent and decorative. Peter Lorre is too cute by far for a rather loathsome and conscienceless slave trader. The slave trade is condemned but not very forcefully and black natives are never mentioned. Henry Daniell shows up briefly as a Sheik, and Herbert Marshall is the prime minister. Chester the Chimp plays the Duchess, who likes her liquor. "A simian sot," Hadyn declares her. Score by Paul Sawtell and photographed by Winton Hoch. 

Verdict: The surplus of silliness works against it. You keep hoping some dinosaurs will show up to enliven things! **1/4. 

VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA (1961)

Robert Sterling and Walter Pidgeon

VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA (1961). Produced and directed by Irwin Allen.

Admiral Nelson (Walter Pidgeon) has come up with an amazing nuclear submarine, the Seaview, with features that "Jules Verne never thought of." When the Van Allen radiation belt catches fire and the world seems doomed by rising heat and fire, Nelson comes up with a scheme to prevent catastrophe by shooting a missile at it, thrusting the fiery belt into space. His scientific colleagues think he's crazy, and he also meets opposition from Captain Crane (Robert Sterling) and Dr. Susan Hiller (Joan Fontaine), a headshrinker come to study the men who thinks the admiral is off his rocker. With armed subs chasing the Seaview, a saboteur on board, the rising possibility of mutiny, and other assorted dangers including floating mines and a huge octopus that grabs the sub, Nelson may never get the chance to fire his missile. 

the sky is on fire!

Irwin Allen may have been inspired by the success of Disney's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea as well as Fox's Journey to the Center of the Earth, but he came up with a winner with this fast-paced and very entertaining fantasy-adventure. Pidgeon gives one of his best performances, and the others -- including Barbara Eden as his secretary and the Captain's fiancee, and Peter Lorre [The Beast with Five Fingers] as Nelson's friend and associate Commander Lucius Emery -- are all on target throughout. The picture has a very good script by Charles Bennett and Allen that maximizes the potential of the storyline and adds suspense and tension at every opportunity. 

Sterling, Fontaine and Eden

Not everything is perfect. A scene with a big prop and unconvincing squid attacking Crane as he tries to tap into an underwater cable seems to go on forever and is not that well done to begin with (at least the octopus that shows up later is real). But the business with deadly floating mines that jeopardize the ship is quite tense and there are other exciting sequences as well. It's also fun watching Pidgeon slapping disrespectful seaman Frankie Avalon [Horror House] in the face and a certain lady falling into the shark pool. Winton Hoch photographed the film -- the splendid Seaview looks terrific -- and Sawtell and Shefter contributed an effective score. The whole business with Nelson having to fire the missile at an exact day and moment from the Mariannas is gobbledygook but who cares? The movie was successful enough to engender a TV series that lasted for four years.

Verdict: One of Allen's very best. ***1/4. 

HELL HATH NO FURY

Loretta Swit

HELL HATH NO FURY (1991 telefilm). Director: Thomas J. Wright. 

Terri Ferguson (Barbara Eden of Dead Man's Island) has a happy marriage to furniture store owner Stanley (David Ackroyd). One afternoon Stanley is murdered by an old girlfriend, Connie (Loretta Swit), who has been obsessed with him since college. Not only does Terri have to deal with the loss of a man she loved, but she discovers they were practically broke, their daughter (Amanda Peterson) far preferred her father over her mother, and now the police are zeroing in on her as the primary suspect. Meanwhile Connie changes her appearance and befriends Terri, who has no idea that this is the woman who ruined her life ...

Barbara Eden

Hell Hath No Fury is an absorbing telefilm, although it never becomes the nail-biter it could have been. Loretta Swit offers the best performance as Connie, who improbably manages to hide her demented state a bit too well. Barbara Eden has been offered a terrific role in this -- better than psycho-Swit's, in fact --  but while she's competent, she simply hasn't the acting chops to really make the most of this opportunity. Amanda Peterson is adequate as Michelle, but Conor O'Farrell offers a flavorful if obvious performance as a young detective who is smugly convinced of Terri's guilt. Richard Kline and Kim Zimmer are fine as close friends of Terri's who try to help her through her ordeal and wind up paying a terrible price. William Lucking plays an older cop, and Natalie Core has a strong moment or two as Connie's very distraught mother. 

Verdict: Entertaining "psycho-bitch" movie with some exciting moments. **3/4. 

DEAD MAN'S ISLAND

Barbara Eden

DEAD MAN'S ISLAND (1996 telefilm). Director: Peter Roger Hunt.

Henrietta O'Dwyer (Barbara Eden) is an investigative reporter who was once in love with a man named Chase Prescott (William Shatner). Nearly thirty years have gone by, both have married other people, and Chase is now a very wealthy industrialist with a mansion on an isolated island that was once Indian land. Chase asks Henrietta to come to the island and informs her that someone tried to poison him; he wants her to ferret out who the would-be murderer is before he or she can succeed in taking his life.

William Shatner

The suspects in the movie consist of a near-classic 90's TV cast (in addition to Eden and Shatner, of course): Morgan Fairchild is an actress who wants Chase to back her in a Broadway show; Traci Lords is Chase's current and much younger spouse; Christopher Atkins and David Faustino (from Married With Children) are his sons; Olivia Hussey and Christopher Cazenove are the maid and butler; and Jameson Parker, Roddy McDowall and Don Most (from Happy Days) are his employees. As for motive, some of them will get a large amount of cash in Chase's will, while others have different grudges to bear.

Morgan Fairchild

Eden is, as usual, pleasant, but she isn't that convincing in her role, and her narration of the story is unnecessary. The other cast members are no better than they should be and Roddy McDowall is Roddy McDowall. If you like murder mysteries with the usual elements and two-dimensional suspects, there are much worse movies than Dead Man's Island, which moves pretty quickly and has some suspense, even if you may not entirely buy the denouement. It's amazing that Eden was actually sixty-five when she made this teleflick as she looks years younger. The island and mansion settings for the movie are beautiful.

Verdict: Not exactly Agatha Christie, but fun. ***.