In this film noir spoof set in 1947 and shot in black and white a private eye, Charlie Nickels (Dean Lemont), goes to see a client (Lesley-Anne Down of In the Devil's Garden) who fears her life is in danger and sure enough she is shot to death not much later. Suspects include her nerdy son, Clive (Nicholas S. Williams), sexy daughter, Veronica (Raleigh Holmes), the fired gardener and butler, and a chubby femme fatale named Mona (Kirsten Vangsness) who is a sultry singer in a nightclub. This should all be great material for a hilarious satire but the movie is slow and dull and shockingly unfunny, with only a couple of mild chuckles throughout. Occasionally the dialogue is clever, but more often cliched. The stylized performances aren't especially amusing either, defeating the whole purpose of the movie, although some of them, especially Vangsness -- who does a mean imitation of Kathleen Turner -- and Down, give it their all. The climax is a little bit interesting, but not enough to save the movie. This was based on a stage play that might have worked with the right players, but Carol Burnett herself might have been stumped by the material. Vangsness was the executive producer and two of her co-stars on Criminal Minds have parts: Shemar Moore in a bit as a piano player and Joe Mantegna as Bugsy Siegel.
Verdict: This is deadly all right. Watch Kiss Me Deadly instead. *1/2.
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