A WOMAN POSSESSED

Ian Fleming, Margaretta Scott, Francis Matthews

A WOMAN POSSESSED (1958). Director: Max Varnel. 

Widow Katherine (Margaretta Scott) has not seen her son John (Francis Matthews), who has studied to become a doctor, for two years. When he returns home, she is startled to discover that he has brought with him his hitherto unsuspected fiancee, Ann (Kay Callard). What follows is a modestly intriguing and suspenseful character study as we shift sympathies from Ann to Katherine and back again. Is Ann over-reacting to her future mother-in-law, not recognizing that she is afraid of losing John? Or is Katherine a potential monster-in-law? Katherine tries to mend fences with Ann, or is that just an act? She admits she resents Ann's presence, as does the long-time housekeeper, Emma (Alison Leggatt). Then there's an incident with a dog ... 

A Woman Possessed moves fast -- it is just over an hour long -- and holds the attention, although some viewers may see the ending coming from a mile away. In any case, the actors are solid all around, including Ian Fleming (not be confused with the creator of James Bond) as John's sympathetic and practical Uncle Walter. 

Verdict: The actors help keep you absorbed in this somewhat satisfactory suspense story, a typical low-budget Britain "B." **1/2. 

THE BERMUDA DEPTHS

monster from the depths

THE BERMUDA DEPTHS (1978 telefilm). Director: Tom Kotani. 

Now here's an odd one. As a boy Magnus Dens (Leigh McCloskey) lost his father when their house and laboratory in Bermuda was destroyed by something unseen. Years later, the still befuddled young man returns to Bermuda and encounters an old playmate, a woman named Jenny (Connie Sellecca). He also reunites with his pal, Eric (Carl Weathers) and Prof. Paulus (Burl Ives), who worked with Magnus' father. Eric and Paulus are on the hunt for a creature that may be responsible for the disappearance of ships in the Bermuda Triangle. But Paulus tells Magnus that the woman named Jenny is not real -- she is either a figment of his imagination or the ghost of a woman who died at sea many years before. She apparently lives forever because she sold her soul to a sea god in the hopes he would spare her. And what is her connection with the huge marine animal that pops up sporadically? Is it the sea god? 

Intense: Leigh McCloskey

The Bermuda Depths can't make up its mind if it's a monster movie, a ghost story, or an outre romance, and it doesn't quite work as any of them. It would be easy to just dismiss this as an awful mess, but it's also strangely absorbing and one could argue that at least it's something different. The monster is a big prop and it has a decided connection to Gammera as well as with a pet that Magnus had as a boy. As for the actors, they all play with conviction, with McCloskey etching a portrait of a man with decided emotional issues who is quick to anger. Julie Woodson is given some very effective moments as Eric's wife, Doshan, and Ruth Attaway is fun as the peculiar old cook, Delia. You might wonder how Burl Ives wound up in this but he's fine. 

Big Daddy: Burl Ives

According to Paulus, Magnus' father was trying to come up with the cause of mutations that create gigantism in sea life. Huh? Would anybody actually do that in real life? Apparently his research into gigantism created a monstrous organism that is now romping off the coast of Bermuda. Unfortunately we don't see nearly enough of this creature, although it does figure in an exciting climax. The film takes advantage of beautiful Bermuda locations. Apparently this rather silly if engaging movie has a lot of fans, and a film entitled Back from the Bermuda Depths is in development! 

Verdict: Too weird for its own good. **1/2. 

HOT ROD GIRL

Chuck Connors and John Smith

HOT ROD GIRL (1956). Director: Leslie H. Martinson. 

Mechanic Jeff Northrup (John Smith of Legacy of Blood) goes into a funk after his younger brother, Steve (Del Erickson), is killed after being goaded into racing in his hot rod. Although Jeff, who was in the car with his brother, tried to stop him, he loses his license and loses an interest in racing. His girlfriend, Lisa (Lori Nelson), tries to help him get over his depression, along with sympathetic cop Ben Merrill (Chuck Connors). Later, Jeff resists getting into a race with an out of town hotshot, Bronc (Mark Andrews), but tragedy results anyway. Now it's a question of who is responsible for a boy's death -- Jeff or Bronc?

Lori Nelson and Mark Andrews

Hot Rod Girls is an acceptable time-passer that might have amounted to something with a better script. The acting is generally competent, with John Smith giving a very good portrayal of a decent guy caught up in circumstances beyond his control.  Frank Gorshin of Batman fame scores as Flat Top, a flippant friend of Jeff's. Although he had very few credits, Mark Andrews makes his mark as the sinister and unpleasant Bronc. Roxanne Arlen is cast as the dippy blonde, L. B., and Dabbs Greer owns the auto shop where Jeff is employed. There's a fairly exciting sequence when Bronc and Flat Top play "chicken" in their cars, as well as a chase at the climax. Like most of these movies, the teens in this are played by actors in their thirties or thereabouts. Although Lisa is shown to be a racer herself in the movie's opening scene, this aspect of the film -- women racers -- is completely ignored despite the title. 

Verdict: Won't make your pulse race, but entertaining enough on its own terms. **1/2. 

BUS STOP: I Kiss Your Shadow and A Lion Walks Among us

Reason, Jenny Maxwell, Fabian

BUS STOP TV series. 

Bus Stop was an hour long 1961 drama series that lasted for one season. It focused on the inhabitants of a small town, including Grace (Marilyn Maxwell), who owns a restaurant or "bus stop;" waitress Elma (Joan Freeman); Sheriff Will (Rhodes Reason); and District Attorney Glenn Wagner (Richard Anderson). Sometimes these people participated in the weekly installment; at other times they showed up briefly or not at all.

The series has not been released on DVD yet, but there are two grainy episodes available on youtube, because these were "special" episodes. "I Kiss Your Shadow" was the 26th and final episode of the series, and it was based on a short story by Robert Bloch. The story concerns a man, Joe (George Grizzard),  whose wife, Donna (Joanne Linville), is killed in an automobile accident. He claims that Donna, who was a bit smothering when she was alive, is now haunting him, and attacks anyone who tries to come between them, including his psychiatrist, who is pushed out of a window. 

Dianne Foster

This episode has become famous because in his book Danse Macabre, Stephen King (who had probably not seen the episode in decades) wildly overpraises it. Children may have found it scary, and there are maybe a couple of creepy moments (and I never read the short story, which may be superior), but I found "I Kiss Your Shadow" to be obvious, trite, and predictable, although well-acted by the above-named, as well as by Alfred Ryder as Donna's brother and Richard Anderson. John Newland was probably tapped to direct this because of his association with the show One Step Beyond.

Anderson also has a large part and is excellent in a controversial episode entitled "A Lion Walks Among Us." which is quite well-directed by Robert Altman. Luke Freeman (pop singer Fabian) is a handsome young psycho who murders a country store clerk and seemingly gets away with it. The person who could have placed him at the scene is D.A. Wagner's wife, Sally (Dianne Foster), an alcoholic who gave Luke a lift. but then ordered him out of the car when he got fresh. 

Young Psycho: Fabian

Luke has a different story, and the defense attorney, Oliver West (Philip Abbott), who is a friend of the Wagner's, has to make mincemeat of the poor woman on the witness stand, a situation that is devastating to her husband. Rhodes Reason also appears in this episode as the sheriff and is fine. As for Fabian, he gives a better performance than expected, and uses his sexy looks and charm to etch an interesting portrait of a nasty psychopath. Dianne Foster is outstanding, especially in the courtroom scenes, and the episode is a stand out. The climactic scene was originally to have been much more violent, but even in this form there was some protest from viewers. Considering the ending of the story, I assume there were repercussions in future episodes.

Verdict: I Kiss Your Shadow: *1/2. 
              A Lion Walks Among Us: ***. 

THE CRATER LAKE MONSTER

The monster from Crater Lake

THE CRATER LAKE MONSTER (1977). Director: William R. Stromberg.

"I've been stuffing my shoes with newspapers for so long that my feet know more than my head does." -- Mitch. 

A meteor flashes across the sky and lands in Crater Lake in Oregon. The heat from the meteor causes a prehistoric egg to hatch, and before too long a long-necked, big toothed plesiosaurus -- the same creature that is supposedly in Loch Ness -- is snacking on the locals and a few tourists as well.

Glen Roberts and Mark Siegel

The Crater Lake Monster is a low-budget and generally forgettable monster movie that does boast some good locations, atmospheric photography (Paul Gentry), and some decent stop-motion and model work by Dave Allen. The monster has a battle with a steam shovel, but its appearances are simply too infrequent to make this pic a contender. To pad out the running time, there are such characters as a magician and his wife, as well as a convenience store robber and killer, all of whom encounter the creature. There is also way too much footage devoted to two buddies, Arnie (Glen Roberts) and Mitch (Mark Siegel), who rent boats to some of the victims; their allegedly comical appearances only dissipate the film's minor tension. At least Siegel gets the movie's funniest line (see above). 

Richard Cardella and Bob Hyman

Richard Cardella, who plays Sheriff Steve, also co-wrote the screenplay with the director, and Bob Hyman is cast as the town doctor.  Most of these actors had no other or very few acting credits, although Siegel has done a lot of work in visual effects. This was Stromberg's only directorial credit. Animator Dave Allen has the monster moving much like the dinosaur in The Giant Behemoth in one sequence. An unconvincing prop head is also used for other shots. An unintentionally hilarious moment occurs when one character talks about how she can supposedly see thousands of stars in the sky but it's broad daylight outside! The movie has a downbeat conclusion. 

Verdict: A monster you can miss. **. 

DEAD MAN'S ISLAND

Barbara Eden

DEAD MAN'S ISLAND (1996 telefilm). Director: Peter Roger Hunt.

Henrietta O'Dwyer (Barbara Eden) is an investigative reporter who was once in love with a man named Chase Prescott (William Shatner). Nearly thirty years have gone by, both have married other people, and Chase is now a very wealthy industrialist with a mansion on an isolated island that was once Indian land. Chase asks Henrietta to come to the island and informs her that someone tried to poison him; he wants her to ferret out who the would-be murderer is before he or she can succeed in taking his life.

William Shatner

The suspects in the movie consist of a near-classic 90's TV cast (in addition to Eden and Shatner, of course): Morgan Fairchild is an actress who wants Chase to back her in a Broadway show; Traci Lords is Chase's current and much younger spouse; Christopher Atkins and David Faustino (from Married With Children) are his sons; Olivia Hussey and Christopher Cazenove are the maid and butler; and Jameson Parker, Roddy McDowall and Don Most (from Happy Days) are his employees. As for motive, some of them will get a large amount of cash in Chase's will, while others have different grudges to bear.

Morgan Fairchild

Eden is, as usual, pleasant, but she isn't that convincing in her role, and her narration of the story is unnecessary. The other cast members are no better than they should be and Roddy McDowall is Roddy McDowall. If you like murder mysteries with the usual elements and two-dimensional suspects, there are much worse movies than Dead Man's Island, which moves pretty quickly and has some suspense, even if you may not entirely buy the denouement. It's amazing that Eden was actually sixty-five when she made this teleflick as she looks years younger. The island and mansion settings for the movie are beautiful.

Verdict: Not exactly Agatha Christie, but fun. ***. 

HAPPY DEATH DAY

Israel Broussard and Jessica Rothe

HAPPY DEATH DAY (2017). Director: Christopher Landon. Screenplay by Scott Lobdell.

After the death of her mother, college student Tree Gelbman (Jessica Rothe) has turned into a self-absorbed and rather unlikable person. She meets a young man named Carter Davis (Israel Broussard) and finds herself tangled in a Groundhog's Day-type time loop where she relives her birthday over and over. Each time a mysterious figure wearing a goofy clown mask (which somehow makes him more sinister) attacks and kills her. Tree finally figures that only by unmasking and killing her killer can she get back to her normal life. 

Charles Aitken and Jessica Rothe

Happy Death Day has perhaps too many moments of black comedy to sustain tension, but it does hold the attention, and there are a couple of good twists at the end. Rothe is okay as the heroine, who develops a nicer personality throughout her ordeal, and Broussard is appealing as Carter. Ruby Modine makes her mark as Lori, Tree's long-suffering roommate, and Charles Aitken is fine as a teacher with whom she has an affair. Despite the lack of gore, Happy Death Day was a big enough hit to engender a recent sequel Happy Death Day 2U. 

Verdict: Some good surprises help put his over. **1/2. 

GAMMERA, THE INVINCIBLE

The big turtle attacks a ship!

GAMMERA, THE INVINCIBLE (aka Daikaiju Gamera/1965-1966). Director: Noriaki Yuasa. 

When several Russian pilots carrying atomic bombs fly off course, one of them crash lands and sets off an explosion that awakens a sleeping monster: the dread Gammera, a gargantuan turtle who can roast people with his flame breath a la Godzilla. Gammera seems mean-tempered, although he saves the life of an idiot little boy who has an obsession with turtles, an act which doesn't stop the turtle from stomping on others. Just when the authorities think they have found a way to stop the turtle's rampage, it turns out that he can turn his shell into a flying, spinning projectile with flame coming out of its openings. Gammera feeds on fire and other forms of energy. What to do? What to do? 

Dick O'Neill as the general in added scenes

Like Godzilla before it, Gammera is a combination of a 1965 Japanese film with American footage released in the U.S. the following year. This footage features a General (Dick O'Neill) barking orders at his staff, as well as a meeting at the U.N. with the Secretary of State (Albert Dekker of Dr. Cyclops) and General Arnold (Brian Donlevy of The Creeping Unknown). There is also a comical TV show in which the existence of Gammera is debated by two feuding and nutty scientists. The Japanese characters include Dr. Hidaka (Eiji Funakoshi), who tries to destroy the monster even as the U.N. come up with plan "Z." 

Brian Donlevy

Gammera, who can walk on its hind legs as well as on all fours, is brought to life via "suitmation" (a stunt man in a costume) as well as with several props and a lot of miniatures. Some of the process work is cruddy but at other times it's effective at blending the monster with the screaming, hysterical populace. The odd thing about Gammera is that the script is workable, but the execution is haphazard, and one suspects this was the case even before the American footage was spliced into the original movie. Gammera was featured in several sequels and became a hero to small children a la Godzilla.

Verdict: Somehow a turtle just doesn't make a very formidable monster despite the damage he does. **. 

COVER GIRL KILLER

Spencer Teakle and Felicity Young

COVER GIRL KILLER (1959). Writer/Director: Terry Bishop.

John (Spencer Teakle) has inherited a pin up magazine called Wow. He discovers that several of the women who appeared on the cover have been murdered, and are found wearing the same outfits and in similar poses as on those covers. Detective-Inspector Brunner (Victor Brooks) importunes June (Felicity Young) to pose for the cover so that he can trap the killer (Harry H. Corbett), a scheme that doesn't thrill John, who is in love with June. But the killer, who goes about wearing a wig and weird spectacles, is more clever than the police may realize and June could be in serious danger.

Harry H. Corbett in disguise

Cover Girl Killer may sound like a good bet for thriller fans, but this British production doesn't have the lurid intensity of, say, Horrors of the Black Museum, or the American film The Hypnotic Eye. About an hour long, it looks like a cheap TV production and although it does manage to hold your interest, has minimal suspense and excitement. Besides the fact that there is little flair to the direction, this is due to an overly sparse musical score (attributed to William Davies) that might have added a small degree of tension. There have been better half hour TV shows on the same theme than this. Everyone in this British film drinks coffee instead of tea!

Verdict: Some coffee jitters might have helped this movie. **. 

HORRORS OF THE BLACK MUSEUM

Michael Gough

HORRORS OF THE BLACK MUSEUM (1959). Director: Arthur Crabtree.

Crime writer Edmond Bancroft (Michael Gough) taunts Scotland Yard for failing to solve the murders of several women in extremely grisly incidents. The latest victim had needles shot into her eyes and brain when she looked into a doctored pair of binoculars. Bancroft thinks the murders may be tied into Scotland Yard's "black museum" of criminal artifacts, although he has his own black museum that in his opinion puts the Yard's to shame. 

June Cunningham

Bancroft has a handsome assistant, Rick (Graham Curnow), who does whatever his employer tells him. Bancroft is also keeping a buxom lady named Joan (June Cunningham), but in a scene that plays like something out of Of Human Bondage, she bitchily taunts the lame author when he refuses to give her any more money. Joan is later beheaded by a man with a grimacing, disfigured face. And there are more murders to come ...  

Michael Gough and Beatrice Varley 

Horrors of the Black Museum is a delightfully lurid and ghoulish horror flick with the usual zesty, adroit, if over-the-top performance from Gough at his best. Cunningham is also vivid and gets to do a sexy dance number in a pub. Curnow, Geoffrey Keen as Superintendent Graham and  Gerald Andersen as the ill-fated Dr. Ballan are also effective, while Shirley Anne Field makes an attractive fiancee, Angela, for Rick. Beatrice Varley also makes her mark as Aggie, the owner of an antique and notions store that stocks many items of interest to Bancroft. 

Graham Curnow 

Horrors of the Black Museum is a riot of deadly guillotines placed on top of beds, dead bodies boiled in acid, murder by ice tongs, and other tasteless tidbits that will delight the horror fanatic. One imagines that the first sadistic killing involving the binoculars might have turned a few stomachs back in the day. This is one of a trio of films Gough did for producer Herman Cohen, Konga and Black Zoo being the other two. 

Verdict: All this and CinemaScope, too! ***. 

SOLDIERS OF FORTUNE

John Russell and Chick Chandler

SOLDIERS OF FORTUNE 1955 - 1957 syndicated television series.

This half hour show lasted two seasons and concerned the exploits of two adventurers who would do just about anything and go anywhere if the pay was right: Tim Kelly (John Russell) and Toubo Smith (Chick Chandler). The show used old sets from Republic films and serials as well as a lot of adroitly-employed stock footage. Russell and Chandler -- the former tall, handsome and macho, with a splendid physique, the latter short and plucky -- complimented each other perfectly.

Chandler and Russell

In one first season episode Kelly suggests that Toubo is getting too old and tired, should settle down and marry, he's over the hill. "A friend shouldn't say that to a friend," says an offended Toubo. "Who says you're a friend," replies Kelly "We travel around together," protests Toubo. To which Kelly replies, "I'm just keeping you out of trouble." The viewer honestly doesn't know if Kelly is joking or not, but in an episode in the second season, Kelly clearly risks his life to save his buddy's when the latter is nearly sacrificed to natives, so there's no doubt that there is a genuine bond of friendship between the two men.

John Russell before his Lawman TV series mustache

Soldiers of Fortune was not a classic series, but it was entertaining and (via stock footage and standing sets) managed to send the boys all over the world. Among the more memorable "A" episodes were the following: a woman is plagued by a voodoo cult in "Drums of Far Island;" a Chinese salesman in Limehouse is embroiled in a smuggling plot in "Hatchet Man;" sabotage holds up construction of an underwater tunnel in Cuba in "Sandhogs;" and the boys go undercover on a cargo ship with a sinister crew in "Crew of the Dolly D." 

Chick Chandler

Out of fifty-two episodes I have managed to see all but five, but at least half are of B+ quality. Guest-stars include Henry Brandon ("Greatest Beast" -- was an oil man killed by a Tibetan monster?); Jay Novello ("Vanishing Island" -- that  occasionally rises to the surface and holds a treasure); Beverly Garland ("Lady and the Lion" -- intrigue on an African film set); Jean Byron ("Tattooed Lady of Torima" -- a beautiful woman runs a diamond racket in Columbia); Michael Emmet ("Skull of the Inca" -- an educated native returns to headhunter land to find treasure and encounters giant lizards from One Million B.C. instead). 

"City of Doom" with Pamela Duncan

Also Grant Williams ("Lady of Rajmahal" -- a rajah's frightened wife wants to leave home with some priceless art treasures); Adele Jurgens ("Danger Sisters" -- two gals with a knife-throwing act get into trouble in Tangier); and Pamela Duncan ("The City of Doom" -- a maharajah's sister fears that a cult that is against progress will eventually destroy the city). Many episodes featured women whom at first seemed warm and sympathetic and turned out to have a dagger up their sleeves, and duplicitous characters of both sexes abounded. 

Verdict: Basically a fun if imperfect series that was easy to take. **1/2. 

VENOM (2018)

Tom Hardy as Eddie Brock

VENOM (2018). Director: Ruben Fleischer. 

Reporter Eddie Brock (Tom Hardy) winds up fired from his job when he goes up against billionaire scientist Carlton Drake (Riz Ahmed), who sends men into space to look for resources and finds some weird aliens called Symbiotes. Drake wants to merge the aliens with humans and uses homeless people, most of whom don't survive, for experimentation. Eddie's fiancee, Annie (Michelle Williams), loses her job, too, and cancels their engagement. 

Eddie confronted by Venom

Eddie eventually winds up bonded with one of these creatures himself. The alien talks to him, calls himself "Venom" and has to be talked out of biting people's head's off when he's hungry, which doesn't always work. Venom knows that a group of his kind plan to take over Earth, but he likes it here, and tries to help Eddie prevent Drake -- who has bonded with an alien known as "Riot" -- from taking off into space. 

Venom on thee rampage

Venom is actually a character that was introduced in the Spider-Man comic books. Peter Parker put on a black costume he found during the "Secret Wars" and only later discovered that it was alive. Reed Richards of the Fantastic Four helped him separate from the symbiote, which later merged with Eddie Brock (and later with the serial killer Cletus Kasady, as well as with Parker's friend, "Flash" Thompson.) Played by an appealingly grubby Tom Hardy, Brock is more of a sympathetic figure in this movie than he was in the comics. 

Riz Ahmed

Although Venom begins quite well -- and the FX work throughout is quite good -- the movie eventually becomes a mess, getting sillier and more ridiculous as it goes along. Venom might have worked as an outre horror film, but the PG rating works against it, and this doesn't really jell as a part-time black comedy. The movie has no real climax, because there has to be room for a sequel. There are a couple of exciting moments, but the battle between Venom and Riot kind of falls flat. 

Verdict: Not one of the better Marvel movies. **. 

CULT OF THE COBRA

Faith Domergue as Lisa

CULT OF THE COBRA (1955). Director: Francis D. Lyon.

Several soldiers are in Asia in 1945 when they encounter a man named Daru (Leonard Strong), who tells them he can get them in to see the rites of a snake-worshipping cult  -- the Cult of the Cobra -- for a price. Unfortunately, while the ceremony is going on, one of the men, Nick (James Dobson), stupidly takes a photo with a flash bulb! Pandemonium results, one cultist is killed, and a death curse is placed on the heads of the fleeing G.I.s. 

Leonard Strong, Jack Kelly, Reynolds, Janssen

Back in the U.S., Tom (Marshall Thompson) learns that Julia (Kathleen Hughes), who dated both Tom and his roommate Paul (Richard Long), has decided to marry the latter. A despondent Tom is happy to meet a beautiful new neighbor, Lisa (Faith Domergue of Legacy of Blood), and they quickly fall for each other. In the meantime, Tom's G.I. buddies -- Rico (David Janssen), Carl (Jack Kelly), and Pete (William Reynolds) -- begin dying in mysterious ways, and Lisa takes surreptitious walks late at night. The Cult of the Cobra. also known as Lamians, always claimed some of the cultists could change from human into snake ... 

On the rebound? Marshall Thompson

Cult of the Cobra is an entertaining picture with an interesting cast. Although Domergue may not seem like the perfect choice to play an Asian snake goddess, she gives a generally good performance, as does Marshall Thompson. Domergue convincingly gets across her distress that she may be forced to kill a man that she is falling in love with. The other actors show little emotion as their buddies start dropping like flies. The picture has no atmosphere or much directorial flair, although it does generate some suspense towards the end. Kathleen Hughes is decorative as Julia. A confrontation between her and Domergue is over just as it starts to get interesting. 

Verdict: Worth one look but probably not another. **1/2. 

THE WASP WOMAN

Susan Cabot

THE WASP WOMAN (1959). Produced and directed by Roger Corman. 

Janice Starlin (Susan Cabot), the head of a once-flourishing cosmetics company, has a problem. Now hitting forty, she uses younger models in her ad campaigns, but now the sales are falling off because these models don't have an image that registers with consumers as she does. She realizes that she might not only save her company but look young again when she is contacted by Dr. Zinthrop (Michael Mark), who tells her he's developed an enzyme from wasps that has remarkable properties. Alas, it also has a deadly side effect, and before long people in the building start disappearing. A hideous woman with a freakish wasp-like face is on the loose! 

The Wasp Woman on the rampage!

The wasp paralyzes and devours her victims while they're still alive. This last aspect is sort of glossed over (one can imagine it would take Janice quite some time to completely consume the hefty watchman played by Bruno Ve Sota), and there isn't much real on-screen bloodshed in the movie. The pic isn't that well-paced, either, but its last quarter has some exciting sequences, such as when the Wasp Woman attacks a nurse and drags her off for dinner. Susan Cabot is very good in the lead, although one never knows exactly how much she remembers of her exploits once she's turned into the buzzing, hungry horror. Barboura (sic) Morris is a secretary, and the board members include Anthony Eisley, Roy Gordon [Attack of the 50 Foot Woman], and William Roerick. Leo Gordon's screenplay has its amusing elements and some good dialogue to go with it. Fred Katz's brassy score is unusual, but I'm not certain it's the best kind of score for this kind of horror flick. This is one of those movies that you can't take seriously but nevertheless has its depressing aspects because the characters are in such an utterly hopeless situation. 

Verdict: Cute little Corman horror film. **1/2. 

DIE SISTER, DIE!

Jack Ging

DIE SISTER, DIE! (1978). Producer/director: Randall Hood.

"Life is the one disease that's always fatal."

Edward Price (Jack Ging) has always hated his sister, Amanda (Edith Atwater). because she lives in the family mansion and has control of the money. She has attempted suicide more than once but never quite succeeds. Edward hires former nurse Esther (Antoinette Bower) to care for Amanda, with the instruction that she is not to do anything to save her if she decides to try killing herself one more time. But Esther doesn't realize that the brother and sister are hiding a dark secret. The family doctor (Kent Smith) doesn't have a clue, either.

Edith Atwaterr and Antoinette Bower

Yes, Die, Sister Die! sounds like it might be a good bet for suspense fans, but be forewarned that the movie has little suspense, its revelations come much too early in the story, and the picture has no style or dramatic tension. The script isn't helped by mediocre direction and actors who have probably given better performances elsewhere but seem only vaguely interested in what's going on here. Kent Smith probably comes off best. This is one of those movies that has a workable and even intriguing storyline but muffs it on virtually every level. Hugo Friedhoffer's musical score is incredibly dull and does nothing for the picture. Edith Atwater was also in Strait-Jacket with Joan Crawford. NOTE: IMDB reports the rumor that Jack Ging importuned friend Clint Eastwood to finish the film after the credited director passed away. 

Verdict: If it didn't have enough problems, a slow pace really sinks this. *1/2. 

BENEATH THE PLANET OF THE APES

James Franciscus

BENEATH THE PLANET OF THE APES (1970). Director: Ted Post. 

An astronaut named Brent (James Franciscus) is sent on a rescue mission to find Taylor (Charlton Heston) from Planet of the Apes, and conveniently pops into Earth's future at just about the point that that film ended. Taylor had gone deeper into the "Forbidden Zone" to find out what else is there, while Nova (Linda Harrison) wanders back to "civilization" and meets up with Brent. The two eventually encounter the friendly chimps Zira (Kim Hunter) and Cornelius (David Watson). Maurice Evans is back as the human-hating Dr. Zaius. 

Maurice Evans as Dr. Zaius

However, the main story of the picture has to do with the gorillas, under the orders of General Ursus (a hammy Paul Gregory), deciding to invade the Forbidden Zone and declare war on whatever inhabitants are inside there. These turn out to be disfigured human mutants with telepathic powers who worship an atomic bomb. And things get even sillier after that until a big blow up at the end that should be horrifying but is almost comical.

Brent explores the NYC subway 2000 years later

Beneath the Planet of the Apes is schlock science fiction at its worst, "borrowing" from everything from "By the Waters of Babylon" by Stephen Vincent Benet to Jungle Jim (with natives worshiping a bomb) to The Time Machine to all those mutant-in-the-future movies of the fifties and sixties such as World Without End (an in-joke, perhaps, has the mutants singing a hymn of that title). Their main HQ is Grand Central Terminal in New York. 

There are some good things in this otherwise tedious and terrible movie. At one point a mutant forces Brent and Taylor to fight to the death in a jail cell and this is a lively, well-choreographed sequence, perhaps the only real moment of excitement in the picture. Although a matte painting of a shattered Manhattan is pretty poor, there are some good underground sets of the subways and sunken buildings. None of this is original, of course. The acting is okay, but the only humanistic touch is when the skipper of Franciscus' spaceship, who dies shortly afterward, thinks about the fact that his wife, children and everyone he knows are long dead; Skipper is very well-played by Tod Andrews. Despite the movie being a stinker, it made enough money (because of the massive popularity of Planet of the Apes) to engender several more sequels. 

Verdict:  Ape crap. *1/2. 

BRIDE OF THE GORILLA

Barbara Payton and Raymond Burr

BRIDE OF THE GORILLA (1951). Writer/director: Curt Siodmak. 

Dina (Barbara Payton) is married to the wealthy plantation owner Klaas Van Gelder (Paul Cavanagh), but is secretly in love with his foreman, Barney (Raymond Burr), who returns her feelings. Barney is indirectly responsible for Van Gelder's death-by-snake, but the aged maid Al-Long (Gisela Werbisek), covers up for him and plots her own revenge. Barney begins imagining that he is transforming into a gorilla, and it starts driving him crazy, driving him into the jungle at night as well. Then there are stories of sightings of a supernatural creature that can tear a man to pieces ,,, 

Tom Conway and Lon Chaney, Jr. 

Bride of the Gorilla is similar to another Curt Siodmak film, Curucu, Beast of the Amazon, in that it promises a monster that it never delivers. With photography by Charles Van Enger and a flavorful score by Raoul Kraushaar, the film looks professional, but its script -- despite some interesting elements -- is dead on arrival. I imagine the film had a short shooting schedule as in many scenes the actors seem self-conscious and under-rehearsed. In spite of that, Raymond Burr and Barbara Payton have at least one well-played love scene. Cavanagh is as smooth and adept as ever in his brief appearances, and Tom Conway and Lon Chaney Jr. do the best they can with weak material. Woody Strode, who would go on to much better things, appears very briefly as a policeman. 

Verdict: Fortunately for Raymond Burr, Perry Mason put an end to his appearances in movies like this. **. 

TEENAGE THUNDER

Chuck Courtney

TEENAGE THUNDER (1957). Director: Paul Helmick. 

18-year-old Johnny Simpson (Chuck Courtney) is a sullen, difficult teenager who keeps making stupid choices, allegedly because his father (Tyler McVey) is neglectful and distant. Johnny takes up with plain-but-appealing waitress Betty Palmer, (Melinda Byron), who asks her sister "why aren't boys as smart as girls are?" True, Betty is a lot smarter than Johnny, whose life is made miserable by bad boy Maurie Weston (Robert Fuller), who not only gets him to play "chicken" but nearly gets both of them killed until Betty intervenes. Johnny's father tries to teach him self-defense, but it backfires, and Johnny steals a hot rod from his former boss, Burt Morrison (Paul Bryar), and takes off. But when he learns that Burt wants to race the hot rod for his son, Jimmy (Gregory Marshall), who has polio, Johnny may have a change of heart. 

Robert Fuller on the left with uncredited player

Teenage Thunder is not really a wild exploitation film with juvenile delinquents and wild, painted women -- more's the pity -- but more along the lines of a lower-budgeted Disney picture, with obvious moral statements and a wind-up meant to tug at the heart strings. The best scene is between Tyler McVey and Paul Bryar when Johnny's boss comes to give his father some advice. Although not especially charismatic, Chuck Courtney, who was actually 27,  gives a more than adequate performance, and eventually amassed 91 credits, most of them on television. His most famous film was Billy the Kid Vs. Dracula, in which he played William Bonney. Robert Fuller, on the other hand, who also had a long career, exudes plenty of charisma as Maurie; he and Courtney were good friends in real life. Melinda Byron had only 15 credits. The other actors all turn in solid performances. The climactic race takes all of ten seconds!

Verdict: Not enough of those hot rods! **.