BURKE'S LAW: WHO KILLED CABLE ROBERTS

Paul Lynde

BURKE'S LAW: WHO KILLED CABLE ROBERTS (1963). Director: Jeffrey Hayden. 

Cable Roberts, a big-game hunter who may have been a complete phony, is found dead in his trophy room, propped over a screen that nearly falls on top of the screaming maid (Zsa Zsa Gabor of Country Music Holiday). His personal secretary Arthur Clark (Paul Lynde) -- who is keeping his own secrets -- seems quite distraught over the death, but Roberts' wife Mona (Lizabeth Scott) not only can't be bothered to shed a tear but seems to have no real human reaction other than to blatantly flirt with Homicide Captain Amos Burke (Gene Barry) as if this lass with a pronounced overbite were the most beautiful woman on earth. Burke and his associates -- Detective Tim Tillson (Gary Conway) and Sgt. Les Hart (Regis Toomey of Three for Jamie Dawn) -- talk to numerous suspects, including Roberts' ex-wife Florence (Mary Astor), son Bud (John Saxon), business partner Harry Riggs (Chill Wills of Heartaches), and others. Who done it?

Gerry Conway and Gene Barry

"Who Killed Cable Roberts?" is one of the better episodes of this entertaining, amusing, and often very silly series that ran for two seasons in the sixties before being transformed into Amos Burke, Secret Agent. The acting of the assorted guest-stars in this story is especially notable, with Mary Astor -- no surprise there -- taking top honors along with a terrific Chill Wills. A big surprise is the excellent performance given by Paul Lynde. Although others have called him "campy" in this -- and no one would have blamed him if he had acted that way on this program -- he actually gives an essentially serious dramatic performance and is all the better because of it -- it is really good work. Barry, handsome Conway and Toomey are all at the top of their game as well. 

Verdict: Extra-special episode of this fun series with some fine performances. ***1/4.  

GOLIATH AND THE SINS OF BABYLON

Mark Forest as Goliath

GOLIATH AND THE SINS OF BABYLON (aka Maciste, l'eroe pui grande del mondo/1963). Director: Michele Lupo.  

Having lost a war to Babylon, the price of peace for the nation of Nefer is to have thirty virgins sent to the Babylonian king where they are to be sacrificed. Maciste (Mark Forest) -- known as Goliath in this dubbed American print -- joins a group of rebels who are going to take the fight back to Babylon. One of the rebels is Xandros (Giuliano Gemma), who is in love with the Neferian princess Regia (Jose Greci), the niece of King Pergasos (Piero Lulli). Another one of the rebel group is the midget Areto (Arnaldo Fabrizio) who makes a better soldier than expected. But can they win against the whole Babylonian army?

Guiliano Gemma and Mark Forest

Goliath and the Sins of Babylon is a somewhat more elaborate Italian "peplum" movie although this doesn't prevent it from being somewhat cheesy at times. Born in Brooklyn, Mark Forest makes a handsome and muscularly impressive Goliath. The best scene has him tied to a massive slab as spears drop from holes in the ceiling, nearly puncturing his mostly naked body. The battle sequences are realistically chaotic. The production values are at times impressive, but the sets still look like they were set up the day before filming. It's hard to judge the acting in this sort of thing, but everyone at least looks the part. A good score by Francesco De Masi. 

Verdict: More than passable peblum with some good action scenes. **3/4.   

MATANGO / ATTACK OF THE MUSHROOM PEOPLE

A tense moment in Matango

ATTACK OF THE MUSHROOM PEOPLE (aka Matango/1963). Director: Ishiro Honda. In Tohoscope. 

A businessman, Kasai (Yoshio Tsuchiya), sets sail on his yacht with his skipper Sakuta (Hiroshi Koizumi) and five friends, including the self-absorbed entertainer Mani (Kumi Mizuno) and the sweet and shy Akiko (Miki Ashiro). The others include the writer Yoshida (Hiroshi Tachikawa), the sailor Koyana (Kenji Sahara), and Professor Murai (Akira Kubo). The yacht nearly goes down during a very bad and frightening storm, but the group in the crippled ship mercifully sights land not too much later. On this deserted island they find a derelict research ship on the beach, which they make their home as they repair the yacht, which, unfortunately, drifts off to sea. Everything in the derelict is covered with fungi, and they decide it might be better not to eat the mushrooms that grow everywhere on the island. But some of them succumb ... 

Mami and Akiko

The interesting thing about Matango is how effective it is for much of its length. Well-photographed and directed, with an evocative score, it has a great deal of creepy atmosphere and suspense as we watch this assortment of characters, faced with starvation or a lifetime of isolation, start to unbend, each reacting differently to the crisis they find themselves in. It develops that the island is a ship's graveyard, adding to the ominous quality of the picture, as does the fact that experiments of an unknown nature were being conducted on the derelict ship. 

Where the picture falls down is in its monsters, people who have been turned into mostly mindless mushroom creatures that resemble something you might have seen on sillier episodes of the Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea TV show. The mushrooms also cause hallucinations and flashbacks, so things become a little strange in the final quarter of the film. The English dubbing of this Japanese film is excellent, however, and the performances of both the original actors and the dubbing cast all seem to be quite good.  One comical moment occurs when the group try the radio to see if anyone knows of their disappearance, and the very second they turn on the set their names are mentioned! Some people feel this is an uncredited version of "The Voice in the Night" by horror author William Hope Hodgson. Honda also directed the classic original Gojira (Godzilla).

Verdict: Oddly, this is an absorbing and ultimately depressing horror flick. ***. 

MANIAC (1963)

MANIAC (1963). Director: Michael Carreras. 

Jeff Farrell (Kerwin Mathews, of 7th Voyage of Sinbad fame), is vacationing in France when he comes across an inn run by a pretty young woman, Annette (Liliane Brousse), and her stepmother, Eve (Nadia Gray). Jeff romances both but winds up falling for Eve, who tells him how her husband Georges (Donald Houston of The Flaw) was institutionalized after taking a blow torch to the man who raped his daughter four years before (this is detailed in the prologue). Eve has fallen in love with Jeff and hopes to free the hopefully cured Georges so he can get his life and daughter back, at least, while she goes off with her new love, Jeff. Jeff agrees to help Eve break her husband out of prison, but things go awry when Georges apparently murders the asylum employee who aids him in his escape. Now what do they do? Maniac holds the attention but it has absolutely no style or atmosphere and veteran cinematographer Wilkie Cooper's work is unimpressive. Just about everything about the movie is unconvincing, including the mostly flat acting (especially from Mathews and Gray, who generate little heat) and especially the twist ending, which comes as a surprise but seems to make everything a bit pointless. Jimmy Sangster's [Fear in the Night]  typically convoluted screenplay is not one of his better ones. Like other films, the title was supposed to create an identification with Psycho, but this is nowhere in the same league as Hitchcock's thriller.

Verdict: Watch once and then forget it! **1/4. 

DEMENTIA 13

DEMENTIA 13 (1963). Director: Francis [Ford] Coppola.

When Louise Haloran's (Luana Anders) husband John has a fatal heart attack, she decides to cover up his death and pretend he's gone on a trip so she can still inherit from his mother. (Apparently it doesn't occur to her that a widow might still come into a share of the estate.) But this is only one of the secrets at the spooky and stately Castle Haloran in Ireland, where a barely seen figure with an axe roams about hacking and beheading his victims, and each year the family reenacts the funeral of the young daughter, Kathleen, who drowned seven years before. (None of the characters seem to realize the terrible impact the child's death would have had on Kathleen's mother, who is a bit "off.") 

ax attack on Louise

This early film from the director of The Godfather trilogy is modeled on Psycho in that we at first follow a blond character who is then brutally dispatched a la Janet Leigh nearly forty minutes into the film. Anders is very vital as Louise, as are Bart Patton as her brother-in-law, Billy; Ethne Dunn as Lady Haloran; and Patrick Magee as the family's creepy and tactless physician. William Campbell is Billy's brother, Richard, and Mary Mitchel is his oddly-named girlfriend, Kane. The film is atmospheric, has an effective score by Ronald Stein, and boasts a very well-handled and suspenseful sequence in which Simon, a poacher (Karl Schanzer), is stalked and decapitated. Bart Patton did mostly television work; Luana Anders, who also appeared in The Pit and the Pendulum with Vincent Price, was a busy actress up until her death in 1996.

Verdict: Odd, confusing at times, but strangely compelling and vivid! ***.

BLACK ZOO

BLACK ZOO (1963). Director: Robert Gordon. 

This long-unseen horror thriller is one of three films producer Herman Cohen did with star Michael Gough (the other two are Konga and Horrors of the Black Museum). Like the others, Black Zoo is lurid, somewhat campy fun. Gough is owner of a zoo as well as member of a weird cult of animal worshipers. Threatened with losing the zoo and his beloved tigers and lions -- who lie around his living room like treasured and pampered guests -- Gough sics his pets on anyone who dares to get in his way. His wife Edna (Jeanne Cooper) has a trained chimp act and wishes that hubby were kinder to the handsome mute boy Carl (Rod Lauren) who helps him with the murders. Gough is florid and easily enraged, but as an actor he puts on a lively, energetic show, and Cooper is excellent and equally energetic. The interesting cast also includes Virginia Grey as a booking agent, Jerome Cowan as an entrepreneur, Elisha Cook, Jr. as a zoo worker, and even Ed Platt ("the chief" on Get Smart) as a detective. One of the most interesting scenes is an funeral for the dead tiger Baron that takes place in a misty forest by night. Cooper and Gough have a great, lively dinner scene that ends in an hysterical (in more ways than one) fight. Cooper played Katherine Chancellor on The Young and the Restless; one of her co-stars on that show was Jerry Douglas, who plays a police lab man in Black Zoo. (He's not very good at his job, however, as he thinks a gorilla is "a member of the chimp family!") What's most surprising about this entertaining picture isn't the final revelation as much as how moving it is. Rod Lauren (of The Young Swingers) hasn't a word of dialogue but his expressive face says volumes. (Ironically, the actor-singer was accused years later of hiring someone to murder his wife.) Script by Herman Cohen and Aben Kandel. Robert Gordon also directed It Came from Beneath the Sea. 

Verdict: Lions and tigers and apes, oh my! ***.

THE SQUEAKER

Gunter Pfitzmann and Heinz Drache

THE SQUEAKER (aka Der Zinker/1963). Director: Alfred Vohrer. 

In London a criminal mastermind called the Snake is being pursued by Inspector Elford (Heinz Drache). The Snake seems to somehow be involved with a zoo managed by Frank Sutton (Gunter Pfitzmann), who receives a threatening letter from the Snake. Sutton's fiancee, Beryl (Barbara Rutting), is a mystery writer as well as the niece of the lovably eccentric Nancy Mulford (Agnes Windeck), who owns the zoo and lives in a sprawling mansion. Other characters include newspaper publisher Sir Geoffrey (Siegfried Schurenberg); his mincing if hetero reporter, Harras (Eddi Arent); Millie Trent (Inge Langen), Sutton's strangely hostile secretary; and the skulking Krishna (Klaus Kinski), who carries out much of the Snake's dirty work. 

Drache with Agnes Windeck

The Squeaker takes a while to get going and some viewers may want to give up on it after about half an hour of relative tedium. But eventually the movie becomes rather lively, with some creative deaths, prowling tigers, weird weapons, and quite a few slithering reptiles, as well as an interesting climax wherein the eccentric old lady -- who has her own axe to grind -- confronts the Snake in her dining room. The villain's identity may or may not come as a surprise, although it's telegraphed towards the end. The cast is game, with Agnes Windeck really scoring as the old lady, but Eddi Arent -- who gives virtually the same unfunny performance in every single movie -- is incredibly irritating.  

Verdict: Yet another West German Edgar Wallace adaptation which is not without interest. **1/2. 

THE INDIAN SCARF

Klaus Kinski and Heinz Drache

THE INDIAN SCARF (aka Das indische Tuch/1963). Director: Alfred Vohrer. In widescreen "Ultrascope."

After Lord Lebanon is strangled in his castle, lawyer Frank Tanner (Heinz Drache) gathers the relatives in the dining room and reads the first of two wills. They all must stay together in the castle for several days before they can hear the details of the final will, or forfeit their inheritance. As an unknown figures goes about strangling virtually the entire cast with the title object, Tanner tries to figure out which of the household is homicidal: the hated American Tilling (Hans Nielsen); his shrewish wife (Gisela Uhling); the bastard Ross (Klaus Kinski); the butler Bonwit (Eddi Arent); the strange and hulking Chiko (Ady Berber); Lady Lebanon (Elisabeth Flickenschildt); her son, Edward (Hans Clarin), a classical pianist; or someone else? 

Elisabeth Flickenschildt and Hans Clarin

Like other West German Edgar Wallace adaptations, The Indian Scarf has a good (if rather familiar) plot, but its execution is mediocre. With its inappropriate musical score and flaccid direction, there are only a few arresting moments, but not a dollop of tension or major suspense, and with this storyline that's criminal. As usual the acting is good -- another vivid performance from Flickenschildt, for instance, and Clarin is quite effective -- and just as usual Eddi Arent nearly stinks up the whole production with his unsubtle allegedly comic approach. However, Siegfried Schurenberg is not cast as a police superintendent but as a victim for a change. An actress named Corney Collins is cast as the Lovely Young Lady and Alexander Engel is the reverend. Although the final scenes are quite well-done, there is a campy coda involving the benefactor of the will that may have you groaning. At least we do hear some nice classical music throughout the film, especially Chopin's "Fantasie-Impromptu" (popularized as "I'm Always Chasing Rainbows") although the jazzed-up version played over the credits is unfortunate. 

Verdict: Even absurd plots should be taken seriously if they're going to work. **1/2.

THE CRAWLING HAND

The hand runs amok

THE CRAWLING HAND (1963). Director: Herbert L. Strock. Colorized.

Captain Lockhart (Ashley Cowan) is the latest in a line of astronauts who are taken over by some strange kind of force while out in space. Lockhart's ship explodes, but his severed arm is found on a beach by Paul (Rod Lauren of The Young Swingers) and his girlfriend, Marta (Sirry Steffen), who freaks out. Inexplicably, Paul takes the arm home, where the hand strangles his landlady, Mrs. Hotchkiss (Arline Judge). Then whatever affected Lockhart in space begins affecting Paul. Will Sheriff Townsend (Alan Hale Jr. of Thunder in Carolina) be able to get Paul under control after he attacks Marta or will he have to shoot him? 

Sirry Steffen and Rod Lauren

The Crawling Hand has some interesting elements and could have been turned into a fairly good movie, but it goes in all the wrong directions and is never as creepy as intended. Probably the most interesting thing about it is the cast, which includes the Skipper from Gilligan's Island, former star Richard Arlen, old-time actress Arline Judge, Kent Taylor [The Crimson Key] and Peter Breck as scientists, and Allison Hayes of 50 Foot Woman fame, criminally wasted as a secretary with only a couple of scenes. Tristram Coffin of King of the Rocket Men also shows up for one sequence as a security chief. Rod Lauren gives an uneven performance, but Steffen showed promise; she only had six other credits, though. Herbert L. Strock also directed Gog.

Verdict: Had possibilities, but this doesn't really work. **. 

THE YOUNG SWINGERS

Molly Bee and Rod Lauren

THE YOUNG SWINGERS (1963). Director: Maury Dexter.

Mel Hudson (Rod Lauren) manages a Hootenanny club called the Vanguard. The owner of the building, a witch named Roberta Crawford (Jo Helton), wants the club out of there and employs dirty tricks to get them gone, using her lawyer Bruce Webster (Justin Smith) to do most of the work for her. Her granddaughter, Vicki (Molly Bee), takes over while Roberta is out of town, and strikes up an acquaintanceship -- and more -- with Mel. Can they get her aunt to change her mind? Meanwhile everyone, including Mel, Vicki, Fred (Gene McDaniels), Pete (Larrs Jackson, who also does impressions), and the Sherwood Singers perform some perfectly pleasant numbers. 

Gene McDaniels

The Young Swingers is not a good movie, but at least everyone in it has a more than decent voice, and most sound much better than the pop singers of today, most of whom sound alike (and are auto-tuned on top of it). Rod Lauren sings better than he acts in this -- he seems tranquilized most of the time -- but he was to become more expressive in such films as Black Zoo (in which he played a mute character). Years later he was accused of hiring someone to murder his Filipino wife. Molly Bee first came to fame at 13 warbling "I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus" and had a respectable vocal career with only a few film credits. Larrs Jackson (aka Jack Larson), who does a lousy impression of Groucho but isn't bad at Ed Sullivan and Walter Brennan, had quite a number of credits after this. Of all the singers in this perhaps the most impressive is Gene McDaniels, who sings two snappy numbers and sings them really well. He should have become as famous as Johnny Mathis and others. 

Verdict: Good songs, good singing, but no real story. **1/4. 

CAPTAIN SINDBAD

Guy Williams as Sindbad

CAPTAIN SINDBAD (1963). Director: Byron Haskins. 

Captain Sindbad (Guy Williams) returns to Baristan from a long ocean voyage and discovers that the kingdom has been taken over by the vile dictator, El Kerim (Pedro Armendariz). El Kerim is invulnerable to death and injury because his heart is hidden away in a high tower inside a swamp filled with deadly creatures. As El Kerim prepares to put Sindbad's beloved Princess Jana (Heidi Bruhl) to death for refusing to marry him, Sindbad and his men attempt to get through the swamp and destroy his large beating heart. But with the unwilling aid of magician Gagol (Abraham Sofaer), El Kerim is not going to make it easy for him ... 

Amendariz and Bruhl

This highly entertaining, fast-paced fantasy film lacks only one thing, some wonderful Ray Harryhausen effects. But you almost don't miss them because this picture has the usual MGM gloss complete with gorgeous technicolor. The production makes the most of that with some stunning art direction and beautiful costuming that is borderline garish but effective. Besides that the film is well-directed by Byron Haskin, who also helmed The War of the Worlds. You do miss the Harryhausen effects when a many-headed hydra shows up late in the picture. Although it is well-designed, it simply can't compare to the stop-motion hydra crafted by Harryhausen in the same year's Jason and the Argonauts. Almost as fake are a bunch of gators who sort of glide over the ground instead of actually walking.

dueling swords

One of the movie's best scenes takes place in an arena, when Sindbad must face a gigantic but invisible creature that leaves huge footprints in the ground -- this has real suspense and excitement. The dangerous trek through the swamp when Sindbad and his men face a dozen perils is also notable, as is the climax in the tower and a climactic sword fight between Sindbad and El Kerim. Williams is heroic enough as Sindbad, Amendariz makes an excellent villain, Bruhl is an attractive and competent heroine, and we also have Abraham Sofaer as the riotous Gagol, Henry Brandon as El Kerim's good right hand, Bernie Hamilton as a mute sailor, and others. The best one can say of Michel Michelet's musical score -- Bernard Herrmann is sorely missed -- is that it is highly derivative. For a kid's film, the movie is pretty intense at times.

Verdict: MGM presents a colorful and even glamorous fantasy picture. ***. 

THIRTEEN FRIGHTENED GIRLS

 13 FRIGHTENED GIRLS (1963). Director: William Castle.

Candace Hull (Kathy Dunn) is an American diplomat's daughter who attends Miss Pittford's Academy for Young Ladies along with many other diplomats' daughters. Her best friend is Mai-Ling (Lynne Sue Moon), whose father is Red Chinese. Candy has a big crush on Wally Sanders (Murray Hamilton of Jaws fame), who works for the state department and may soon be out of a job. When a murder occurs while Candy is visiting Mai-Ling in the Chinese embassy, Candy decides to become a spy -- code-named "Kitten" -- so that she can help Wally out of his career problems. If it all sounds pretty awful, believe me it is -- but not bad enough to be good. This is one of the few William Castle films that has virtually no entertainment value. Kathy Dunn is so shrill and whiny at times that you want to slap her; Lynne Sue Moon is cute and charming, however. Candy's obsession with Wally is inexplicable when there are handsome guys closer to her own age in the movie, with whom she flirts -- but only as part of her spy activities. Hugh Marlowe of Earth vs. the Flying Saucers plays Candy's dad. Joyce Taylor of Atlantis the Lost Continent and who also (badly) played "Rappaccini's Daughter" in Twice-Told Tales, plays Wally's fiancee. Alexandra Bastedo and Judy Pace are two of the girls who became somewhat better known years later. Khigh Dhiegh plays Kang, Mei-Ling's uncle. 90 minutes of your life you can never get back. 

Verdict: Read a Nancy Drew book instead. *.

TWICE-TOLD TALES

TWICE-TOLD TALES (1963). Director: Sidney Salkow. 

Star Vincent Price appears in three stories freely adapted from the works of Nathaniel Hawthorne. In Heidegger's Experiment Price and Sebastian Cabot play love rivals who discover the dead woman they both loved has been preserved by a natural chemical like a fountain of youth. As portrayed by Mari Blanchard, however, the lovely Sylvia comes off more like a hard-boiled slattern than anything else, but there's no accounting for taste. In Rappaccini's Daughter a young man (Brett Halsey) falls in love with a woman (Joyce Taylor) who has been raised on poison by a jealous father (Price) and whose very touch means instant death. This is the best of the three stories but it isn't well served by the insufficient playing of the lovers. As an actor, Halsey was good-looking and little else. Primarily a TV actress, Taylor was vivid enough in George Pal's Atlantis the Lost Continent but in this she's simply bad. The weakest segment is a poor and loose adaptation of The House of Seven Gables which is somewhat bolstered by the appearance of Beverly Garland and not at all by the unlikely presence of Richard Denning, although he's not terrible. More derivative of other horror films than of Hawthorne. 

Verdict: Has its moments. **1/2.